Elton John considered shovelling pig excrement through a journalist's letterbox - as revenge for her cruel comments about his pal Elizabeth Hurley's large baby.
The Rocket Man was furious Britain's Mail on Sunday newspaper columnist Lauren Booth described the actress's son Damian as "facially challenged", so devised an unusual punishment with his long-term lover David Furnish.
He says: "I went mad when the press picked on Liz Hurley and her son Damian.
"Lauren Booth more or less said in the mail on Sunday: 'See what you get when you're a gold-digging b**ch. You get a facially-challenged baby that reminds you for the rest of your life.'
"It's disgusting. This is a child, a beautiful child. David and I were both enraged. We were going to put barrels of pig s**t and put it through her letterbox."