Girlfriend issues strict 'rulebook' for other half on lads' holiday to Magaluf

Oh Magaluf, the land of booze, sunshine and very loose morals. What happens in Magaluf (or Zante, Kavos and Ayia Napa), stays in Magaluf – unless someone uploads a Snapchat of you with your arm around someone who definitely ISN’T your other half.

The concerned girlfriend of 18-year-old Kieran Lumsden from Scotland decided to make sure her bae wasn’t going to stray while downing fishbowl after fishbowl in Maga. Not under Whitney Travers’s watch. She penned an extensive list of holiday guidelines for Kieran to follow while on holiday, complete with illustrations and multi-coloured pen.

The list in full reads:

1. Make sure your phone is charged at ALL times! Phone me at least once a day (2 mins).

2. No girls whatsoever. Don’t look. Don’t talk. Do not touch!!!!!! (Cheat and I will destroy everything Celtic, I will also make your life a living hell. Kim will be told too.)

3. Do not follow girls on social media.

4. Tattoo = naw. You’ll be checked when home.

5. Don’t mix drink. Drugs are for mugs.

6. If on boat party, no drinking games with the opposite sex.

7. Stay in your own bed.

8. Dinny buy girls drink. That money can be spent on me.

9. Text Kim every day. She’ll be worrying.

10. You tell every girl about me ok – if someone flirts, walk away. No photos with random girls or SC stories.

Whitney finishes with “have a nice flight, stay safe,” which is a touching way to end her strict rules. We have to give her kudos for banning drunken tattoos though – nothing drops sex appeal like coming home from a week in the sun with a Skepta tattoo or an inked Harry Potter scar.

It looks like Whitney got her way and Kieran resisted the urge to talk to or buy drinks for anyone without a Y chromosome. Phew. Who said romance was dead?

 

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