19 things you only know if you’re always late

We all have one friend who is always late to everything. A scatterbrain who, despite 20, 30 or 40 years of practice, still can’t arrive anywhere on time.

You might think their habits are infuriating, lazy, even rude, but if you’re the one who’s punctually-challenged, you’ll know that’s definitely not the case.

In fact, a scientific study found that Type A people (ambitious and competitive) and Type B people (creative and explorative) actually judge the passing of time differently. So it’s probably your personality that’s to blame, rather than a complete disregard for other people’s time (there’s another excuse to add to your repertoire).

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Here are the things you’ll only know if tardiness is your nemesis:

1. You don’t do it on purpose. Which is hard to believe for some punctual people.

2. You don’t like being late. It’s embarrassing but it’s the one part of adulting you’ve never mastered.

3. Some people get irrationally angry about your lateness. Whoa, it’s nothing personal. You’re literally late to everything.

4. “On my way” means you’re jumping in the shower.

5. You don’t even believe yourself when you say: “I’ll be ready in five minutes.”

6. When meeting friends, the first thing that comes out of your mouth is always: “SO sorry I’m late.”

7. If you’re only 10 minutes late, you think that’s pretty good.

8. No matter how late you are, if you need a coffee, you need a coffee.

9. You fully believe it’s better to arrive late than to arrive ugly.

10. Your friends/family/partner have started telling you that the meeting time is 15 minutes earlier than it really is.

11. It kind of works in your favour that public transport is notoriously bad because it gives you a plausible excuse.

12. When it comes to good friends though, you no longer bother with excuses. If they know you at all, they know you’ll be late.

13. You think you can beat Citymapper.

14. Because you’re always running late, when something else goes wrong to slow you down you end up being 500 hours late.

15. If you’ve got kids, now you can at least blame it on the toddler. They’re such disorganised travellers…

16. When you actually leave on time and something out of your control makes you late, it feels painfully unfair.

17. You’ve tried setting your watch earlier but when it comes down to it you just think, ‘Oh amazing, I’ve got an extra six minutes to potter around.’

18. You’re late for everything EXCEPT flights. You’re so aware of your own shortcomings that you leave four hours contingency time and still worry about missing your plane.

19. If you ever do arrive on time to something, you feel like you deserve a standing ovation – but no one even acknowledges your achievement.

 

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